I'm infirmed today as the flu and cough that I had been having for the last few days took its' toll. In fact, I'm still feeling up to the task of working but was advised to stay away, not only for my sake but also for the sake of my colleagues. Guess the AH1N1 is still making everyone jittery...
Anyway, I had a chat with a friend earlier and he shared his dilemma with me. He met this wonderful girl about a year back and they both hit it off immediately. The initial stages of their relationship was smooth sailing and they started talking and making plans about marriage about a month into their relationship.
He was a promiscuous person due to his liking of the night life. And the fact that he adores a drink or three makes that worse as he'd end up in bed with someone he doesn't even know sometimes. All this changed when he met that girl, and he vowed to shed all his excesses. He returned to church then. The church that he had abandoned 12 years earlier... He returned home...
It wasn't easy for him to do so as he was so used to life as such. However, tried he did and he succeeded to a certain extent. Along the way, he confessed some of his earlier transgression to the girl, who surprisingly accepted them as part of his past without much fanfare or fuss. She just wanted them both to enjoy the relationship and new start they were making.
And so all seemed rosy. But it didn't end in happily ever after. Some facets of his past caught up with the present. And these were those that he never shared with the girl, not that he didn't want to, but he wanted to make amends first before telling all to her.
The girl flipped when she was made aware of all the allegations thrown at him. She confronted him and he admitted to his mistakes and was told her the truth. Despite her anger, she told him that he needed to regain her trust and that they should start over, probably as friends. Despite the hurt he felt inside, he readily agreed as at least there would still be an avenue for reconciliation.
Things were difficult but at least the sun was still shining through the dark clouds. She was trying to be supportive to him in all his tribulations. He confided his fear that she'd eventually meet someone and then leave him for someone new. She soothed his fears by saying that if that were to happen, she'd take at least up until the end of this year (2010) to get married. And as such, that was the time he had to win her back, she said with a smile...
Then, one day his world came crashing down around him. She told him to get out of her life. When probed, it seemed that she stumbled upon another part of his past. Unfortunately for him, he wasn't even aware of this matter. Had he known that a problem had arose due to his past dealings, he would have done what was needful. And he tried to explain it but she would hear none of it. Seemed that she had finally given up on him.
He was an emotional wreck that day. But when the day passed, he was determined as ever to make his peace with the past and win her back. It's not easy as the girl refused to have any communication with him and it hurt him so to see someone he loved deeply act as such.
He is clutching desperately at straws, he admitted. But he has yet to give up hope. He even shared with me how he had planned to propose for her when he decides to take the plunge. He had designed a wedding invitation card which was to be delivered to the girl. The only thing is that the invitation card was to her own wedding. And to think that he planned this 2 months into their relationship.
I wish could offer him more help besides advice, prayers and a compassionate ear... But perhaps I am unwilling to help and preferred to sit it out and watch how it would unfold... I guess that it's a weakness that I profess as I'm unwilling to lift an arm to assist...
At times, I do know that my words of consolation would ring hollow to him as do my affirmations of faith in God's plan for them both. Perhaps, I should pray that the Lord show me what can I do to help him get through this obviously difficult moment in his life. He lived the high life, one of luxury, fun and enjoyment and turned his back on them all for this one person who made a difference.
I believe the least that I could do as a friend and a brother would be to do something more than what I'm doing...
Any comments on this matter of the heart would be most welcomed. Perhaps even some advice for my broken hearted friend...
He was a promiscuous person due to his liking of the night life. And the fact that he adores a drink or three makes that worse as he'd end up in bed with someone he doesn't even know sometimes. All this changed when he met that girl, and he vowed to shed all his excesses. He returned to church then. The church that he had abandoned 12 years earlier... He returned home...
It wasn't easy for him to do so as he was so used to life as such. However, tried he did and he succeeded to a certain extent. Along the way, he confessed some of his earlier transgression to the girl, who surprisingly accepted them as part of his past without much fanfare or fuss. She just wanted them both to enjoy the relationship and new start they were making.
And so all seemed rosy. But it didn't end in happily ever after. Some facets of his past caught up with the present. And these were those that he never shared with the girl, not that he didn't want to, but he wanted to make amends first before telling all to her.
The girl flipped when she was made aware of all the allegations thrown at him. She confronted him and he admitted to his mistakes and was told her the truth. Despite her anger, she told him that he needed to regain her trust and that they should start over, probably as friends. Despite the hurt he felt inside, he readily agreed as at least there would still be an avenue for reconciliation.
Things were difficult but at least the sun was still shining through the dark clouds. She was trying to be supportive to him in all his tribulations. He confided his fear that she'd eventually meet someone and then leave him for someone new. She soothed his fears by saying that if that were to happen, she'd take at least up until the end of this year (2010) to get married. And as such, that was the time he had to win her back, she said with a smile...
Then, one day his world came crashing down around him. She told him to get out of her life. When probed, it seemed that she stumbled upon another part of his past. Unfortunately for him, he wasn't even aware of this matter. Had he known that a problem had arose due to his past dealings, he would have done what was needful. And he tried to explain it but she would hear none of it. Seemed that she had finally given up on him.
He was an emotional wreck that day. But when the day passed, he was determined as ever to make his peace with the past and win her back. It's not easy as the girl refused to have any communication with him and it hurt him so to see someone he loved deeply act as such.
He is clutching desperately at straws, he admitted. But he has yet to give up hope. He even shared with me how he had planned to propose for her when he decides to take the plunge. He had designed a wedding invitation card which was to be delivered to the girl. The only thing is that the invitation card was to her own wedding. And to think that he planned this 2 months into their relationship.
I wish could offer him more help besides advice, prayers and a compassionate ear... But perhaps I am unwilling to help and preferred to sit it out and watch how it would unfold... I guess that it's a weakness that I profess as I'm unwilling to lift an arm to assist...
At times, I do know that my words of consolation would ring hollow to him as do my affirmations of faith in God's plan for them both. Perhaps, I should pray that the Lord show me what can I do to help him get through this obviously difficult moment in his life. He lived the high life, one of luxury, fun and enjoyment and turned his back on them all for this one person who made a difference.
I believe the least that I could do as a friend and a brother would be to do something more than what I'm doing...
Any comments on this matter of the heart would be most welcomed. Perhaps even some advice for my broken hearted friend...
No comments:
Post a Comment